No Stairway To Heaven
Su-chi had just finished reading The Gateless Gate, a collection of koans. Each koan was followed with commentary by the renowned Zen Master Mu-mon.
Has a dog a Buddha nature? Is the enlightened man subject to the law of causation? What is the path? What is Buddha? Su-chi copied these and all the other questions contained within into a small book. He tied two bricks around the book. Then the book and brick package was wrapped in the finest silk and decorated with gold and silver ornaments.
Whenever a new student asked a question such as those found in the Gateless Gate, Su-chi gave the brick wrapped book to the student, along with a promise of enlightenment, if the wisdom contained within was applied properly.
Su-chi also gave the student an envelope marked "Instructions - Open First" and sent the student, with the envelope and package back to his cell to obtain enlightenment.
Once in his cell, the student opened the envelope to read the instructions.
These were the instructions —
DO NOT UNWRAP THE PACKAGE!
The wisdom contained within must be transferred to you directly.
Five hundred raps of the package on your head should be sufficient.
If, by chance, after following the above instructions, you have not attained enlightenment —
another five hundred raps will certainly complete the process.
Why is the sky blue? Can I have some ice cream? How come water is wet? Are we there yet? Why is it dark at night? Why do we call dogs "dogs" and not "cats"?
Thank HOTU that children do not desire to enlighten foolish monks who spend their very precious (and short) lives contemplating if a dog has a Buddha nature.
Two bricks is too light a punishment for those who have chosen this path to hell.
A thousand is not enough for Su-chi.
Entire lifetimes can be wasted on just one such question.
A single blow can remove the sins of thousands of wasted lifetimes.
Who is asking these questions? Who is answering? Who is listening?
Have you any more questions? — If so, I have a gift for you!